August 4, 1978
- The only thing of significance he has said was that Frank Hope, Minister of Finance, is going to be replaced. When I asked him who was going to take King and Hope’s jobs, he told me to never mind.
- My objectivity is on a very low level right now. I have been rather cold to him at times. My comments have been less than loving, to say the least. He woke me up at 3 a.m. one morning to fuck. He told me he was horny as hell then said, “Hold my cock” (which is the only way he can get a hard-on is to have his cock stroked). I said, “If you are so horny, why do I need to stroke your cock?” He had great difficulty getting a hard-on after that. He told me another time, to come upstairs, that he had something for me. I s[ai]d “Let’s get one thing straight. You’re fucking me for you. I can live without it. You’re not doing me any favors.”
I can’t seem to control my cold-fish sarcasm at times. When I am pissed that is natural, but cold is too close to reality. It is so close to the end, I don’t want to blow it now.
- I have been told I am the longest girlfriend he has ever had. I told him I am not a girlfriend but a second wife. He calls me his wife anyway. He said something about what if we were married or get married someday. I told him I like things the way they are. I said that because I should show some measure of independence. That was probably an inappropriate time – I don’t know. I’ll just be glad when it’s over.
Nothing of significance to write